EFL WRITING 2 CLASS

PANGKALAN BUN CITY


        The one of the places to visit in Central Kalimantan is Pangkalan Bun city. Pangkalan Bun city has a famous name. The name is sweet city. There are some beach in this city. The names are Kubu beach, Tanjung Penghujan beach, Teluk Bogam beach, and Keraya beach. The city also has some square. The names are Pancasila square, Scout square, Kalpataru square, and Monkey square. The city has a castle. The name is Yellow castle. The castle is in Raja village. The city also has a zoo. The name is Tanjung Puting zoo. There are many hotels in this city, because many tourist visit in this city. This city also has a good organized. The goverment organized this city very well. In conclusion, Pangkalan Bun city is a sweet city and has many good places to visit.

Komentar

  1. Unknown6 Desember 2015 pukul 07.10

    In my opinion, the paragraph is good. But, many word that repetition.
    One of the places to visit in Central Kalimantan is Pangkalan Bun. It has a famous name that is Sweet City. It has a castle, there is Yellow castle. It has a national park, there is Tanjung Puting National Park. It also has a good organized. The goverment organized city very well. It has many hotels because many tourist visit in there. It has some beach, there are Kubu beach, Tanjung Penghujan beach, Teluk Bogam beach, and Keraya beach. It has also some square, there are Pancasila square, Scout square, Kalpataru square, and Monkey square. In conclusion, Pangkalan Bun is a sweet city and many places to visit.

    BalasHapus
  2. Unknown6 Desember 2015 pukul 07.10

    Komentar ini telah dihapus oleh pengarang.

    BalasHapus
  3. Ms. WIN13 Desember 2015 pukul 20.26

    I suggest you to use transition signals in your paragraph. Transition signals are words and phrases that connect the idea kn one sentence with the idea in another sentence. They are expressions such as first/second, furthermore, on the other hand, for example, and in conlusion. If you using transition signals you can makes your paragraph smoother and hepls your reader understand it more easily.

    BalasHapus
  4. Unknown16 Desember 2015 pukul 05.24

    Komentar ini telah dihapus oleh pengarang.

    BalasHapus
  5. Unknown16 Desember 2015 pukul 05.26

    I thought it's a good paragraph, but i suggest you to underline the topic sentence before, so it will make the reader easy to find the topic sentence. And i agree with Wahyu and his suggest above, you have to use the transition signals into your paragraph.

    BalasHapus

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